Having just finished up a stream that has knocked my confidence and caused me a level of frustration, I’ve had to turn my head off for an hour or so and reflect on what I’m doing that is preventing me from succeeding. I understand that with poker the variance can lead to downswings and this is to be expected, but I know myself that it isn’t to do with variance and there are other things I’m doing on stream and off stream that are holding me back. I had a long think about it and I’ve condensed it down into 3 major areas of focus.
No Bankroll / Bankroll Management
Personally I think this is my biggest problem. Instead of having a dedicated pot of money that I should be playing with that is of such a size that I can split it down into Buy-Ins, I’m simply depositing from my Current Account at my bank whenever I want to play. It means I don’t have a structure or plan in place to dictate to me which stakes I should be playing at and instead I’m taking cash out of my wages. This is something I’m looking to remedy after Christmas by taking some funds out of my savings (or alternatively waiting for my work bonus in March/April) but it needs addressing. I should think of my poker bankroll as an investment instead of just dipping into it in odds and ends and have the discipline to stay within those stakes instead of randomly deciding before a stream whether to play the $7.50 Bounty Builder or the $33 Bounty Builder. The $7.50 isn’t as much of a hit but taking a shot at the $33 and failing hurts more when it comes out of wages than the set pool.
Not Dedicating Time to Play
I’ve mentioned this before when talking about my playing habits and this is something that I know I’m guilty of (even though it worked out on the one time I won the $7.50 Bounty Builder) but not setting time aside for a session and turning off the distractions is definitely something that I need to get out of the habit of doing. Usually if I’m working from home, I’ll load up a tournament in the afternoon and just passively play it on the iPad or in the evenings I might load up a tournament and play whilst watching something on Netflix/YouTube. In both instances, I’m not giving the game more than 50% of my concentration and it shows in my results. The times where I’ve had 2 tables open on one screen and focused have been great for both my mind and my money – whereas the times I’ve played “on the side” whilst doing other things have lead to making bad decisions. This is definitely a mindset issue of not focusing, but also ties into the BRM point. I’ve just had that mental point of view that I’ll just top up from my main income if I bust – basically justifying to myself the fact that I’m lighting money on fire.
Ignoring the Need to Study
The final area I think that will need to put some time and effort into is studying. I’ve got a lot of material in books and YouTube content from the likes of Jonathon Little etc that is there and ready for me to absorb, but not setting time aside to do so (or worse, doing it passively in the background) is holding me back. I recently made a mistake whilst playing that genuinely tore me up afterwards because I knew in my heart that I made a mistake. I tweeted a player on Twitch (DWstevie) that I’d been tuning into that day and sent him a screenshot and some background – he confirmed that I’d made a mistake. I was short stacked, managed to check through the flop and turned a straight and flush draw. In position. Early position bet and middle position called, but effectively if I missed the River then I was crippled. Even though I had hoped to pick up equity on the turn, I was frightened away by bet when in fact, I had the right odds to call and would have got paid on the River when the flush draw came in (which it did). Had I studied for situations like this up to this point, I’d have known that I had right odds to call the bet and with my stack being between 10-15bbs anyway, it would have been better to check/fold the River if I missed and looked for a spot to shove instead of folding on the Turn when I had plenty of outs to the nuts. This will also factor in that I’d not been in this situation too many times before, a side effect of not playing regularly enough due to no BRM scheme in place and dedicating time to it.
Ultimately this boils down to perspective and what I’m willing to do to make something of myself in this field. Do I want to be a casual recreational that drops in a few buy ins for different stakes a month and plays for fun? Or do I want to play seriously regardless of the stakes, with a proper bankroll management plan, dedicate slots of time to play/stream and a mental focus backed up by adequate study?
I like to think it is the latter, however this is the ‘problem’ of having a full-time job as I’d love to just dedicate all my time to playing and studying, but I have bills to pay. I work 8am-4pm Monday-Friday and my head is mashed when I get home having looked at numbers and screens all day and commuting both ways. At the weekends I spend time with my girlfriend, continuing to work on the house (which will be complete soon), preparing for the following week and allowing my brain some down time from being active all week at work. I think I’ll reach out to a few people to see how they organised their schedule for playing and studying as I haven’t done it in a professional capacity for a long time however this might just happen naturally once I get the ball rolling. I’ll be bankrolled so I’ll be playing regularly within my stakes, I’ll therefore have enough table time fresh in my head to relate back to when studying and I’ll have dedicated time to do it so I won’t be distracted.
These aren’t excuses, I’m accountable for myself and these are the reasons why – they are only excuses if I’m not willing to address them but pass them off as circumstances outside my control and continue without making changes.
I think now is a good time to start planning, studying, working how much I can reasonably save to put into the bankroll and start 2020 fresh.
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